My internship search rages on. I keep finding great internships…for other people. Every other listing I think, “Wow! This would be perfect for….” Then there was the one that sounded great for me, I applied and got an error message after I hit submit. I submitted again only to get another error message that I had already applied. Um, okay. At least I know it’s not because they don’t like my work that I won’t get it, but because I’m a tool. So the search goes on.
A few months ago I was talking with one of my teachers and he said, “You have to let people know you. Put yourself out there.” In a way that was not at all like George Costanza (it was), I replied, “I’ve got a Behance page, a Flickr page, two Tumblrs, a Twitter, and a WordPress blog. I’m out there!”
More calmly then I would have, he said, “No, get out there and meet people who can do things for you.”
“Oh. I don’t think I know those people.” After the last few weeks, I am certain I don’t know those people.
It has me thinking a lot about wanting what we think is best for us versus what the Universe (or God or fate or The Great Spirit or whatever you want to call it) knows is best. Like maybe I am trying to force my own agenda instead of relaxing, relinquishing control and letting whatever is in store for me unfold? Looking back through the last few years I can see how one thing led to another led to another and so on. If even one step hadn’t happened, the whole thing would have fallen apart. So maybe things are gearing up to happen in their own way instead of the way I have imagined? Or maybe I am just sucky at cover letters, internship searches and read too much into stuff?
Anyone who knows me in real life knows that I live for coincidence. Years ago I was talking to a friend about our birthdays. She said hers was February 15. I said, “Wow. That’s weird. That’s my dad’s birthday. Mine is August 1.” She started laughing and said, “You probably won’t believe me, but that is my dad’s birthday.” Oh my God. I told that story to everyone for like 5 days straight. Anyway, just now as I was writing this post (procrastinating), I saw this:
I’ve started to realize that waiting is an art, that waiting achieves things. Waiting can be very, very powerful. Time is a valuable thing. If you can wait two years, you can sometimes achieve something that you could not achieve today, however hard you worked, however much money you threw up in the air, however many times you banged your head against the wall. . .
Interesting, considering what I was in the middle of writing about. I googled, because it was unattributed and that led me to this post on another blog- coincidentally posted a year ago today. This sentence stood out to me:
We can trust that all is on schedule. Waiting time is not wasted time. Something is being worked out – in us, in someone else, in the Universe.
So maybe I am sucky at cover letters, internship searches and read too much into stuff, but I’m going to trust that to everything there is a purpose and it will all work out in the end.
Have a great week!